6 Month Deployment Update

The long road of deployment is soon coming to an end and I’m more ready than ever to have the Hubs home for good. We’re at the half way mark and I wanted to make sure I was documenting these feelings. Definitely a bit excited but more anxious if anything to get our lives back to normal.

“Distance teaches us to appreciate the days that we are able to spend together and distance teaches us the definition of patience – It is a reminder that every moment together is special, and every second together should be cherished”

Six months ago I was telling myself that I could never handle my husband being gone for months on end. I relied on him for nearly everything. We relied on each other. If I was having a bad day at work I knew coming home to him would make it all better. If I forgot to let the dogs out in the morning, he was there to do it for me. If one of us felt sick the other was there to comfort and cuddle.

Once deployment started I assumed so much would change. I thought we’d lose being a team and quickly become two different people. I was surprised to find out we’d definitely drift but for the better. My expectations were incredibly skewed. Without my husband being home, I’ve learned to be more independent. I’ve had to teach myself how to do the larger chores at home like mowing the lawn, checking the fuse box when the power goes out, taking all the cars to get maintenance, and of course killing all the spiders that decide to creep in the bedroom.

“One day closer and one day stronger”

If anything, deployment has made our love grow stronger and I’ll forever be thankful for that. Undoubtedly, everything happens for a reason so I’m sure there’s a bigger plan in store for us someday or somehow. We’ll just have to wait and see what that is come January.

Husband Deployed: 1 Month Update

Wow, one whole month down! I can’t believe so much time has passed since my better half deployed. Truthfully, I feel okay but there are a few things that get to me every once in a while. For instance, my evenings are beginning to blend together and everyday is starting to feel like a Tuesday. It’s the day we tend to forget about, perfectly positioned right in the middle of our work week. Tuesday’s remind us the 7 day stretch has just begun and is no where near over.

Feeling okay about things doesn’t necessarily mean it’s been great. There is nothing easy about your spouse being away. There have been hard days where I wake up knowing it’s gonna be a long one. On those, I try to pack my schedule to offset any unsettling feelings. Staying busy is key! 

There’s also been days where I start my morning off without evening acknowledging he’s gone. As bad as it may sound, I like those days! I hate the constant reminder of my husband being away. Forgetting about it for a while is a nice feeling sometimes.

What’s been my secret tools thus far? FaceTime, Skype, phone calls, text messages and contacting each other any chance we get has made the time go by quick. Along with those, I’ve been trying hard to concentrate on the future and plan for what life will be like when he returns. I’ve taken the time to organize our finances and put together things we have neglected since moving into our home. I don’t want to worry about these things once he’s back.

As for friends and family, everyone’s been great. I’ve gotten a ton of support and love. It’s comforting to know there are individuals that are here when I need them. Still, there are hours where I wish the military talk could just stop. With support comes a lot of concern and frankly I’m doing better than a lot of people give me credit for. I consider myself strong, independent, and successful. I am not one who looks for a “pat on the back” when I know I’m doing a good job. By no means am I used to this much attention and feedback from others.

Even at the beginning stages of our relationship, we kept things very private. We’re not the type to post on Facebook, every hour, just to show the world what we’re doing at that exact moment. We don’t share our anniversary details, rarely our weekend plans, or personal moments. The foundation of our relationship has always been built on making sure we are taken care of before anyone else. I think that’s why I’ve disregarded anyone else’s opinions and continue to do so through this tough time. So far, it’s worked for us that way.

To others out there struggling with a deployment, what is your advice? How have you gotten through your service members time away? If you’re not familiar with this type of life experience, tell me what’s kept you focused through difficult times! I’d love to hear what you all have to say!

My Courthouse Wedding

Hi everyone! I hope your March is off to a wonderful start. Spring is so close and summer is just around the corner. Did anyone else think this winter flew by?!

In today’s post, I wanted to talk a little about my courthouse wedding, what my plan was and how I did it. I know a ceremony like this may be a tad on the unconventional side but ultimately it’s what my husband and I had wanted from start to finish. To be completely honest, it couldn’t have been a more perfect day and I’m so fortunate that everything worked out in our favor.

Let’s Start With The Why 

Growing up, I always imagined myself having a large, drawn out, extravagant wedding. I wanted a big white dress, tons of bridesmaids along with a reception planned for a queen. But as I’ve grown older and gotten more mature, I realized those things were less important to me than other details. My plan had changed from being traditional to a more intimate and modern style.

After we had decided on this casual and laid back arrangement, people began to wonder why? Distant family members would ask, “why rush it”? Others would question if there was a deeper meaning for getting married young and spontaneously. It was almost like we needed to prove something to people in order to do what we really wanted.

In my opinion, our plans were not spontaneous at all. We had been engaged for over 6 months prior and had been living together for most of our relationship. We had fought, cried, laughed, and experienced life together as a couple. To commit ourselves to one another was something we had thought of for a while and was not by any means a righteous decision.

With that said, I do believe it’s important to think about a life changing move like marriage and discuss if it’s a “right time” decision with your significant other. For myself and my husband, it was.

Did I Send Out Invites?

This was one of those things I just didn’t feel was needed in my instance. The family we were inviting was immediate and the only other person attending was a close friend. If your plan is to include all members of the family then maybe some simple invites are needed but for us they were not a necessity.

Things I Knew I Wanted On My Day

There was a short list of keepsake or memory worth things I wanted to include on my wedding day. I knew I wanted a cake, flowers, and a dinner to follow but I didn’t want anything too big or glitzy. I found a local bakery to create my cake, my husbands mother took care of the bouquet, and I chose a fair priced restaurant where we all could gather afterwards.

My Color Scheme

Even though I wasn’t having a large amount of guests come to this event, the goal was to try to make everything cohesively tie together. After many days of pinning on Pinterest, I found some color shades I loved. I geared everything around light rosy pinks and a purple maroon color with touches of ivory. It really wasn’t anything over powering but just enough to be memorable.

The Overall Experience

The process of getting our marriage license to tying the knot was smoother than expected. My advice to others thinking of doing the same set up I did, is to come prepared. Don’t forget cash, two forms of legal identification, where to go, who to see, and your courts availability. Knowing all of this information will make everything go as planned without any issues or hiccups.

To add, if you’re religious and would like the ceremony to serve a specific purpose, make sure you tell that to your judge. Our I do’s were less than 2 minutes but I know some judges can accommodate you if need be.

Reception?

I really quickly wanted to mention what our long-term goal is for a “reception”. In the next coming months, we are planning to send out “Eat, Drink, And Be Married” party invitations. We will be holding a large get-together to formally announce our marriage as well as celebrate with all of our family and friends.

What makes this difficult, is that my husband will be deployed from March 2017-Fall of 2017 so this is something we are still trying to figure out and organize. Will he take leave time? Should we just wait until he returns home? We’re still figuring it out.

To wrap this up, I’d like to again state that the way we got married is not the way everyone chooses to get married. There was much thought, consideration, and discussion over our decision as to what we wanted and what we didn’t. All in all, the day was full of love and new beginnings. As a newly wed couple, we are so excited to be officially husband and wife. Can’t wait to see what the future holds for us!

If you have any questions regarding this topic please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I’m open for discussion on many of the topics I blog about and will gladly answer any you may have. My socials are always linked on the home page for your convenience and I’m pretty quick with getting back to people! Let’s chat!